Sunday, October 4, 2009

31 for 21: My Baby

It started out as one of the most difficult parts - recognizing the delays in Quinn's developmental milestones. I would focus on them, cry about them, unsuccessfully pretend they didn't exist, worry when she would attain them and then worry about what that means long-term now that she seems delayed in them even compared to her peers who have DS. It was all really just too much.

Now, with faith, I try to let go of those painful feelings the best I can because I love my baby girl and I really have very limited control over when she gets things. I love her for who she is - not for who I wish her to be; I love her unconditionally. I really learned that concept now. A lot of people understand unconditionally love on a cognitive level, but they haven't been tested in their heart. Besides in my heart I want to have another baby (foolish I know because my life is so crazy now), but that just won't be in the cards. So this is what I know, I get to keep my baby girl for longer. Why rush life? Why not enjoy what you have in this moment. Maybe Quinn has this purpose for me - recognize what you have, enjoy it while it is going on, and have patience.

Quinn is blessed. She lives in this country where she receives services and the care she needs. She attends private therapy with wonderful therapists. She will get there when she gets there with her milestones. Watch this clip about another little girl in another country. Sometimes we just think about DS here in the US, but it is all around the world. This clip is from a documentary that is about children with special needs and the care they need.


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