Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Breaking the Silence

I haven't posted for a while - It has been crazy busy. I have been thinking about a lot though and just haven't had the time to write it down. Things like - why are there politics even in the world of DS (why can't we just come together)? What is real support? How DS can change some relationships. Stuff like that. Maybe someday there will be posts on those subjects.

Quinn has been doing great. She is more active - not crawling, but getting closer. She is scooting around. She will see a neurologist next month because her head periodically drops. Hard to explain, easier to demonstrate but obviously can't in this format. I am really proud of myself that I am not worrying about that right now. Not much you can do about it now and we just have to wait to see what they say. One day at a time....

I am also proud of how I reacted to a situation over the weekend. We were at a picnic and there was a little girl there who was born a few days before Quinn. She is doing all this stuff - walking, talking, getting herself a drink of water - she was a little spit-fire. Normally there would be this pain in my heart at those time - grieving the loss of my dream of a typical daughter. But this time, I had none of that. I noticed all this little girl could do and found it interesting the difference between Quinn and her, but the pain wasn't there. That was kind of cool. I know the pain may come back some time (it can be like that sometimes, just relapsing out of nowhere), but for now I am celebrating.

-Karyn

2 comments:

  1. Your opening paragraph really touched me. It made me think...maybe too much. When the politics became too much for me...I left the local support. Maybe this is wrong. I am slowly starting to get back in but cautious. Rasing a family my time is divided...just how much time to I fit in for Down syndrome? Am I doing a disservice to Nate by not being "in the loop"?

    I do want to compliment you for not feeling the pain. Development can be so different for each child and we need to celebrate the individual child. Great to celebrate Quinn!!

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  2. Glad you didn't feel the pain. It took me some time. Our oldest daughter had a close friend whose mom also had a baby the year Carly was born. Her baby is 2 months to the day younger. Anyway, I always resented them when it came to milestones. Her little one always passed Carly up. Now, it doesn't bother me. Back then, it did. I guess we grow pretty thick skin when we have to.

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