Tuesday, August 30, 2011

What's the Rush?

Yes, I know it has been a while since I posted. It has been much too long. I have experienced a big adjustment period in my life this summer. I started my new job in April and then this summer I had to take vacation time at that job to work my other part-time jobs. A very long story and not the best summer of my life. But step by step things are getting better. Maybe now I can get back to blogging. At least for now. I really hope.

I was having a conversation with Aidan about the things Quinn can and cannot do. He asked about when she will be able to ride that tricycle in the garage. I said to him, "What is the rush?" Then at the meet and greet tonight at Riley's and Aidan's elementary school, one teacher asks me when Quinn will start Kindergarten and I say "Not for a while, what is the rush?"

That is my new mantra...WHAT IS THE RUSH?

People (including me) often push to do things quicker and faster and now I am wondering why does that matter? Really, what is the rush? Why can't we take a hint from DBT and be mindful and appreciative of the moment, whether it be good or not so good.

Why should I rush my daughter? She is my baby girl after all, my last born. She will hit developmental milestones whenever she is ready. I don't need to rush. I am going to be 40 this year. Turning 40 isn't bothering me, but it does make me realize I don't need to rush my little girl. I should just watch in wonder that the most beautiful girl came from me.

This also translates to other areas of my life. If I am still grieving the loss of my old job working with kids that I loved working with, what is the rush to move away from that grief? I was there 13 years after all and I was great at my job. It is ok to grieve that loss as long as I am functioning and doing what I need to in terms of my new job. I am not going to rush off of that.

If I want validation in a relationship in my life, what is the rush getting over it? Why can't I just work through my feelings at my pace?

Just why do we rush through life so much anyway? Are we rushing to something? Or away from something?

I am reminding myself it is ok not to rush. Even this adjustment this summer teaches me something. I shouldn't rush, I should try to figure out the meaning of this for me.

-Karyn

2 comments:

  1. I found your blog as a result of a show I watched on TV. I was quickly taken by how beautiful your three children are. I read most of the blog and was very moved by the struggles you have encountered in the world around you that are apart from what struggles you "might" have about Quinn. I'm sorry your "pain" is compounded by ignorant, uncaring, condescending and just plain stupid people. (I apologize that I don't know what are the correct words to use to describe how you feel, but I do see the stark contrast to the world around you regarding Quinn and those who are suppose to be supportive.) I lost my sister just five days ago and found that Quinn's glowing eyes and bright smile brought joy to my heart. I was struck by something I read about DS children. They are here to teach us how to love. I will never forget that and I thank you for lifting my spirits and I wish you God's speed. Mary

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